You really gotta give it up to the girl. She's the epitomy of famous. And she will be for the longest of decades to come, whether you like it or not. After murmurs took over the internet for weeks that she would be lending her talents (her... talents) to a VMA performance tonight, the internet was instantly set ablaze. Days later, her new single leaked. "Gimme More" sparked so much interest that all her comeback glory all of a sudden came riding on one single-important-performance. What other singer commands that kind of attention and power? And no one has ever gone as batshit crazy as this one; but, oddly, its only made her more popular and engrossing. Anyway, she opened the show with a performance that makes you wanna pull hairs out of your leg with some tweezers, and everyone will probably chastise her for it since it was her one opportunity not to fuck up her comeback. "One" opportunity. Right. I thought her one opportunity was when she broke up with that husband that gave their kids ecstasy and taught the homeless how to smoke crack from their pipes properly... then she flashed her crotch. Nobody embodies the mystery of fame and celebrity more than this bitch, and I don't blame her. I think she gets it now. She can go ahead and shoot Avril Lavigne at the Grammys, cop a plea deal the next week, and go quadruple platinum from that shit. She's done more wrong than any of us could before killing ourselves with the utmost embarrasment.
So I guess I'll commend her for now... unless she straightens up and acts all normal and shit again. Then I'll think she wasted an opportunity.
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